Whoa. I love a beautiful Christmas CD my friend Wanita gifted to me a few years ago that is full of really pretty Christmas songs from the eastern provinces of Canada. My mother took her parenting style from the script of Mommy Dearest but she grew up between the West Coast and the East Coast because my Grandpa was in the navy. So while she was a troubled soul she did inspire in me a love of the Celtic-inspired songs from the Maritimes and the Rock.
We all love this particular CD and I play it in the van for most of the Advent season actually. The first song is this beautiful one and listening to it this year these lyrics really hit home in a different way as I face Advent and Christmas after losing a child this year. It's very pretty, and fiddle by Cape Breton's own Natalie MacMaster always bring tears to my eyes. If you want to have a listen, I do have George's CD mix playing and you can pause it by scrolling down on the left before you play this one.
It just spoke to me this morning and I think it's going to be my special song this month. My mantra. Get me through December. Get me through without breaking down.
Please Lord, get me through December. I want to remember our George but keep the holidays sweet and special for our older children. Help me, like Mary, be aware of all these things around me and on my mind, but ponder them in my heart (Luke 2:19) and not as a sobbing mess at some school or church gathering.
Get me through December. Lyrics are under the Youtube link.
GET ME THROUGH DECEMBER
Vocals: Alison Krauss
Fiddle: Natalie MacMaster
Lyrics: Gordie Sampson & Fred Lavery
Based on the melody 'Neil Gow's Lament For The Death of His Second Wife'
How pale is the sky that brings forth the rain
As the changing of seasons prepares me again
For the long bitter nights and the wild Winter day
My heart has grown cold my love stored away
My heart has grown cold my love stored away
I've been to the mountain left my tracks in the snow
Where souls have been lost and the walking wounded go
I've taken the pain no girl should endure
But faith can move mountains of that I am sure
Faith can move mountains of that I am sure
Get me through December
A promise I'll remember
Just get me through December
So I can start again
No divine purpose brings freedom from sin
And peace is a gift that must come from within
I've looked for the love that will bring me to rest
Feeding this hunger beating strong in my chest
Feeding this hunger beating strong in my chest
Get me through December
A promise I'll remember
Just get me through December
So I can start again
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12 comments:
That was an absolutely beautiful song and a beautiful post...just beautiful...I was praying for you this weekend and I will remember you as I try to cope through this month, also. I have three children's bdays this month and that has taken all my strength to plan and do for them. I love your reference to Mary and how she pondered things in her heart. I feel like I ponder a lot of things in my heart lately not daring to speak them out loud or express them to others. My husband is a dear and listens so sweetly, but I still find myself alone (with God) thinking and wrestling...
Blessings to you....
This is such a beautiful song. I have chills listening to it. Thanks you so much for sharing.
Please Dear God get us all through December. Beautiful song. I stuck some of the lyrics in my Facebook status - not really sure why because I'm not one to really update at all, but its better than earlier today where I had to really keep myself from changing my status to "Bah Humbug".
December 1st has hit me hard. Five months ago today Isla was born. Although I'm sure its not just the 1st of the month that is bothering me, its the first of THIS month.
Please get us all through December, so we can start again.
xoxo
Thanks Karen for the warm thoughts and prayers. I need all of 'em I can get!!!! Betty, I'm glad you liked the song, too. And Isla's Mommy - I'm so very sorry that today is five months since you lost Isla. Sending you love.
Karen, this must be the heartbeat of every babylost mama. Today it suddenly hit me that I'm not happy about Christmas being here. I'm actually dreading it. What a beautiful song, I love Alison Krauss' music. Thank you so much for sharing it.
xo
Karen, you have me sobbing over my morning cuppa.
A very apt song for all of us.
Yesterday hit me hard too, but in a way I can't make sense of yet. I find myself making Christmas decorations, wanting to honour my baby, but also wishing I can just "get through".
Karen that was so beautiful. It's so funny (not ha ha funny) how the music we love takes on different meanings for us once our child dies. There are songs I have loved that I can no longer listen to because they remind me in some ways of my son or our loss. Thanks for sharing this personal connection of yours with us. Hugs
Karen...there are so many similarities between us--sometimes it baffles me. My mother was also a Mommy dearest replica....I have a restraining order in place to protect my family from her manipulation and poisonous ways. I just wanted to thank you for being so sweet about my Ferdinand's upcoming surgery. I was so terribly sorry to hear about Duncan...how horrible that must have been for you all. I don't even want to imagine....but I am much more enthusiastic about neutering my pup now due to your cautionary tale.
Sending you love as you try to make the holidays special for and with your children...all of them. (XXX)
Karen,
thank you so much for sharing this beautiful song. Last December my grief was so fresh, I was in an absolute state of shock and the holidays came and went without my acknowledgment. This year, it hurts more. I miss the 15 month old I should have here with me. It is just so hard. I will be thinking of you, and praying that this month is kind to all of us babyloss mommas.
Peace xx
Kristin
I think I have been singing this song in my own way and asking God to get me through December - my sorrow after Akul passed away. It has been so dark and cold and wet - it has been so sad and hopeless and I so much want my faith to move mountains and I am still waiting for the winter to pass.
Thinking of you today.....
Thanks for this lovely song. I applaud your efforts to juggle your difficult loss with your living earthly kiddos this Christmas. I can only imagine how tricky that must be at times.
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