Welcome to day 5 of 25 days of Giveaways, the wonderfully inspired idea of Tina at Living Without Sophie and Ellie. I am happy to participate again this year. I haven't been blogging or reading blogs very much in the last year and I miss it. It was all the bereaved mums online who got me through those terrible early months after our George died and on through that first year. Just once my husband was laid off and I had to get busy with freelance work, well, there isn't much time left. He's been working since last fall but we're still trying to get back on track. Some day!
The first year I participated in this giveaway I was absolutely broken by grief. The last thing I wanted to do was celebrate anything when our lives had been turned upside down. It was nice to reach out to other women who understood and to comfort each other in a season that reminded us of what we'd lost. Now, two years later, not a day goes by that I don't remember our son and long to have him with us but the grief, while still there, is less raw. We all remember him and know there is a place empty where there should be a brother. I'm happy that my older children remember George and speak his name and I am beyond grateful there is a new little person in our midst - the most loved and doted on rainbow baby sister in the world. Nothing compares to the love from siblings who know what it is to lose their sibling.
Leave a comment and I will close the contest at 12 midnight December 5th Pacific Standard Time because I'm a West Coast gal. I'll then use random.org to pick two winners from among the comments. I'm putting this post up a bit early - December 4th here where I am - because I know on the other side of the world it is already December 5th or nearly December 5th. I don't want to leave anyone out!
Often we focus on our sorrow and grief journey. So for something a bit different I thought I'd ask if everyone to share something beautiful that you remember about your baby or pregnancy. I'll go first:
George was our fifth child and fourth son; he was the first child for whom we knew gender. The week before he was died during my labour (full-term stillbirth), we got the video camera out and had the other children talking to him in my belly. Everyone was so excited to meet the baby - they didn't know it would be another boy as we kept that a surprise - and they patted my tummy and told him how much they loved him. It is bittersweet to watch now but it makes me think how loved this little soul was. He was loved and wanted and surrounded by the laughter and hopeful anticipation of his siblings. And then he went gently and surrounded by love. He was big and beautiful and looked just like his brothers and sisters. While I wish he was here with us, that gives me some comfort.
Wishing everyone the peace that surpasses all understanding for this Christmas, Hannukah, and holiday season.
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